The Prodigal Sun

Something positive for a change

Ok... with all this negativity I have been talking about lately, I need to brighten it up a bit. So I will NOT tell you about my macbook pro drama and my screen going black and me being without my laptop for a week, or that I have to bring it back to get repaired and be without it another 7 to 10 days... nope... I am NOT here to talk about that... (ARRRRRRRGH!)

What I do want to talk about is my girl Jennifer Hudson. As you know, if you have read my blog in the past... I am a big fan of JHud. I have loved her ever since her AI season and I even stopped watching in protest when she was voted off after singing the best non-Whitney version of 'Run to You'... (well... I did tune in to the finale to see Fantasia win... I couldn't help myself... I loved Fantasia too... lol)

We have all heard about Jennifer Hudson's tragedy, losing her Mother, Brother and Nephew in one fell swoop... and our hearts went out to her. I know I really felt for her... So I am really glad to see her back on the scene, and come back in such a major way...

No doubt you have all seen her performance at the Superbowl singing the National Anthem... well if you haven't, here you go...

I have said it before, and I will say it again... JENNIFER HUDSON IS ONE SANGIN' AZZ HEFFA!!!!! WOOOO... THIS GIRL CAN SAAAAA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAANG! I mean dayum... its crazy. I LOVE her voice. And I love her runs... I love her power. I just love to hear her sing.

And immediately after the superbowl, the press was all over the fact that she lip-sync'd. So fukking what? She had to sing it at some point... its still her voice... and its no less amazing. And really, she didn't need to lip sync. She can perform like that live, and has proven that time and time again. JHud is one artist who doesn't need studio magic... that is for sure.

I am just glad to have her back. If she can overcome losing 3 family members at once... and still shine... how can I be upset about a laptop issue... or a houseguest that is a pain in the azz... or a friend who has drama in her life... 

Looking at what she has overcome makes my issues seem so small and insignificant... Just goes to show that no matter what happens, you have to keep on moving... and that you can overcome anything. Kudos to JHud.

Watching a train wreck in slow motion...

Have you ever had to watch one of your close friends date someone you knew was bad for them... but tried to be supportive because they were 'in love' with this person? I have been trying... and trying to be supportive for the past year of one of my female friends relationships... but I just can't do it anymore.

From the moment they met a year ago, they have not gone through a single solitary week without a ridiculous dramatic screaming match argument. For real, they can't go 7 days without yelling and screaming like they are on Jerry Springer... WHAT THE FUKK ARE YOU ARGUING ABOUT IN THE FIRST WEEK? WHY ARE YOU STILL DATING IF YOU FIGHT LIKE THAT THE FIRST WEEK? They argue about everything from serious stuff to chicken... no, really, one fight was literally about chicken.

But for some odd reason, she pursued a relationship with this dude. A couple of months later... she moves out of state to be with this dude. No job, no apartment... goes and lives with this dude she can't get through a week without screaming at. No, really. I didn't get it either. I advised her against it. I said just get a job first... get your own place... date for a minute. What's the rush? But, she did it anyway.

As the months pass, the fights continue... she is kicked out a few times, because after all, it was HIS place, not hers or theirs. One time it was so extreme she called one of our mutual friends to come get her because she was locked out and walking in the pouring rain with no where to go. And despite all this... I tried to be supportive. When she called I would try to be impartial. Its her life, she has to make her own conclusions. So I never pushed for her to leave him or interfered with their relationship at all.

She was told that she could not be friends with any of her exes, two of which are our close friends. She complied, and called and told both that she was in a relationship and can't talk or associate with them anymore... then dude got upset with her and told her that she wasn't supposed to call them... she was supposed to just ignore them and not talk to them at all. So despite her compliance and cutting off good friends, the manner in which she did it was still wrong, so it STILL led to an argument.

I get semi-monthly calls to say 'it's over'... some of them tearful... some are mid argument and I can hear dude in the background screaming at her, and her screaming back at him in my ear... and now I am to the point where, I know that no matter what I say, or how upset she is, that after a few hours and her blood cools, she will go back and try to work it out. So... we kinda have a routine. She calls upset talking about its over, dude comes up screaming... I say, why don't you handle that there and call me later... usually I don't hear anything from her for days and I have to call and check on her. And she is like... oh yeah, I am good, and explains that they worked it out and how their problem is communication, or miscommunication... or how they have come to some new understanding... or how they are going to get counseling... or how they are only going to send each other text messages when they are upset so that the arguments don't escalate into screaming matches... there is always some new fandangled approach. (Does this sound ludicrous to any of you too?)

If you have been married 35 years... ok... I would get it. Do what you need to do to stay together. You have a serious time investment. But... after barely a year, when you were fighting like this from the jump? FIGHTING IS THE RELATIONSHIP! What are you fighting to save?

And when I tell ya'll... this is only the surface shyt... I am not even getting into some other shyt that makes my blood boil. Before ya'll ask, no she has never been beaten... so while this seems so battered wife syndrome... she is not battered. (altho abuse can be mental, and that is definitely the case here...) 

During the past 8 months she has been living with him, she got a new great job. And just this month, they moved into a new apartment with BOTH of them on the lease... The last time I was with them, an argument broke out and she ended up crying herself to sleep in the living room with us, while he slept soundly in the master suite. Well... at least she wasn't outside in the rain.

I don't want my friend to feel like she can't come to me. But at this point... I can't fake supportive anymore. It's like watching a friend get hit by a train in slow motion. You see her on the track, and you see the train coming... but despite your screaming and yelling, she doesn't move. Until she realizes her own value and self worth, the train doesn't exist to her. She will not see the train.

I can only pray that she will come to her senses... and see it before it's too late.

I am worn out...

Ok... so I know I have been gone for a minute. (My last post was October 30th...) And I haven't posted because, well... after such a long pause, I felt like I needed to come back with a bang and talk  about something deep. Like election night... holiday experiences or the inauguration (I went to DC)... but every time I thought to sit down to try to write something deep... time would get away from me, and another day would pass. Now three months later... what brings me back to blogging is not a matter of depth... its FRUSTRATION AT BEING IN THE SAME PREDICAMENT OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AD NAUSEUM!!!!

ARRRRRGGGH! If you read my blog, you know that I have been trying to avoid having one of my friends stay at my apartment for months and months. And if you don't read my blog, you can read about it here(learning to say no), and here(the dreaded phone call). Well... during my blog absence in December, she got booted out of the place she was staying because of drama that wasn't her fault, and was forced to move her stuff out THAT day. Who do you think she called? That's clearly rhetorical because you already KNOW who she called in tears... and you know I don't do well with crying desperate people in need...

So, I caved, and went to help her move her stuff out. She has been in my guest room for the past two months. And I am over it.

First, I started noticing little bug bites on my body. And I was thinking it was mosquitos... turns out, there were flea issues on my couch... I DONT HAVE ANY PETS! Now I can't specifically blame it on her because they could have come from anywhere... but... I ain't have any flea issues before... and the girl she was staying with was a hood rat. What do you think?

Then... I thought the fleas were the only issue... then... I found a BED BUG on my bed, where she spends most of her time watching TV. Again, I can't specifically blame her for that, but... I NEVER HAD BED BUGS BEFORE!!!

I freaked out SOOOOO badly that I threw my mattress and boxspring out on the roof and didn't even want them in my house at like 4am. I have fumigated twice, sprayed heavy duty bug spray all around my house, threw out a bunch of bedding and all my pillows, and washed every single article of clothing I own... then on top of that, sprayed everything else I couldn't throw out. I haven't slept in my room in 2 weeks...

And then... on top of all of that, I just hate having someone in my house... and its all these stupid little things that I would dismiss if she were just visiting... like... watching tv in my room and falling asleep in my bed. If we ain't fukkin, GET THE FUKK OUT MY BED! Or falling asleep with the TV on... if you ain't paying my con ed, you need to turn my shyt off the MINUTE your head knods the first time! Or using my body wash... or eating food I prepared for later... I hate going to get something and it not being there... or not putting the garbage bags in the can properly... you are a grown azz woman... you see how the bag is in there when you took the full bag out... but you can't figure out how to put a new one in? ugh.

I am trying to give her time to get herself situated. She is starting her own business and is literally broke... but for real, we are all grown. If I needed to stay somewhere for more than a week, it would be with my family. I would not impose on my friends like that. 

But she is broke... and has no place to go... and as aggravated as I am having my personal space invaded by yet ANOTHER extended stay by one of my needy friends... my conscience won't let me do what I want which is tell her to find some place else to stay because I am worn out... 

So I will just vent here... because I am frustrated... and aggravated, because... I am a bleeding heart and way too empathetic.

Sometimes I wish I weren't so... nice. I am just hoping I don't snap and flip out and ruin our friendship... which is a very real possibility... Pray for me.

107 years old...

I just received a call from my aunt in Georgia to tell me that my grandfather is ill. His organs are beginning to fail him, and that we should all start making plans to come visit him.

Initially it sounds really sad... but in the course of conversation, my aunt casually starts a sentence with, "well, at 107 years old..." and I had to stop her... What did you just say? 107 years old? Grampa is 107 years old? wow.

I know I should have had some idea of his age, as most people know at least what decade of age their grandparents are... but this is my fathers dad. I didn't really grow up spending too much time with him. Plus... he was well into his 70's and already old when I was born. So he never seemed to age to me because... well... 5 years added to old... is still just... really old... lol

He never seemed to change because he was still very active and competent. He was even FRISKY! He used to flirt with women ALL the time (which always grossed me out.) Did I mention that he had completely lost his site by the time I was 8, and used his blindness as an excuse to be feely touchy with women? Yes... my grandfather is quite a character.

But at 107, you can't really be sad. Living to be 107 is to be celebrated. It's a blessing. My grandfather has lived a full life. Hell, he had my dad when he was in his 50's (clearly my dad was NOT planned... lol) And he now has great great great grandkids. He has lived through Jim Crow, the Civil Rights movement, 2 World Wars, Vietnam War, the Cold War, the Great Depression, the invention of the TV, computer and the internet, the first man on the moon... and soon the nations first Black president!

Its amazing to me... our lack of a relationship seems like such a missed opportunity... There is such a wealth of experience that I could have learned from. Well, at this point, there is not much I can do about it.

Anyway, I am not sad. I am happy that he got to see and experience so much. And I am glad that he is not in pain. AAAAND... I am REALLY happy and glad to have his genes... lol

Time to take a trip.

the dreaded phone call...

So you guys know that I have been dodging the 'live with me' discussion with my friend for a while now... well, today, it could not be avoided when she brought it up, and I said no. I put out all the stuff I did in my blog. I am tired of people living with me. I like having my peace and quiet. That she is putting me in a really uncomfortable situation and its not about her, its about my sanctuary being disrupted.

And she agreed with everything I was saying. She got it. She saw that what I was saying made sense... but... just as she was apologizing for putting me in this situation, she caught me off guard... she started to cry...

ugh...

I could drag this out... but if you have a sense of my personality from this blog, you already know I caved in. Sometimes I wish I weren't so sensitive, and soft-hearted. But she seemed so desperate to get out of the situation and she had no one else to turn to... I felt like I didnt have a choice.

I am still getting my desk. And I made it clear that there needs to be a plan in place and actively looking for her own place ASAP. But... it looks like I am going to have a houseguest after all.

If there is such a thing as Karma... I better have something REALLY good lined up for me for always being the nice guy... ugh.

If it walks like a corny bootleg cripple foot queen...

Remember that post, Entertainment Drama, where I said I was in a theater production that was going up soon? I am not anymore.

More Drama... To sum up a long story... the theater production I was a part of was canceled... 3 weeks to opening date, after I endured FOUR MONTHS of drama. The writer/producer (whom I will call the cripple-foot queen) of the production decided that we (the actors) were not ready and it was our fault because we were not stepping up our game.

Now if this was indeed true, and we were at fault, I would have accepted the criticism and called it a day. But the situation we were in, was because of him. Among MANY other ludicrous things he did, he switched directors THREE times, and the last switch was two weeks ago, only 5 weeks before opening. And the new director changed up all the staging, so we basically had to re-learn the entire show.

I am drained. There were so many ghetto negroidian things going on that I don't even have the energy to recount them all. I cussed out the cripple-foot queen via email (because if I called or saw him in person, it would have gotten ugly) and I released it. I let it go. I can't deal with the negativity. It didn't work out, oh well... on to the next thing. If I think about my wasted time for the past 4 months I am liable to flip the fukk out and catch a case. So I will take it as a learning experience. I felt like this production and the cripple-foot queen were corny and bootleg from the start, but I second guessed myself.

If it walks like a corny bootleg cripple-foot queen, and talks like a corny bootleg cripple-foot queen... then it is a corny bootleg cripple-foot queen. I learned to trust my instincts.

In other news...
I have been thinking about my guest room issues... I still want to be able to put up my people if they come visit for a weekend or something... but I don't want it to be taken for granted. So, I have decided to change my guestroom into an office. I figure if there is no visible bed in there, it changes the energy of the room. And if I am really using it as an office, I will feel less guilt saying 'hell no' when people ask me to stay for extended periods. Check out this desk that I found. Its a desk with a hideaway bed.... what do you think? I love the function of it... but I am not sold on the design... if you guys know of anything similar, but better looking design-wise... holla at me.

         

Learning to say no...

A friend of mine is staying with her family, but having drama with them and hates going home. So she is asking to stay in my guestroom til she gets her own place... I love her to death. She is a great friend who has done so much for me... but... she is not being kicked out, so she is not homeless. And I know her financial situation is fukked up, so I know she is not ready to move into an apartment anytime soon. And most of all... I am sick and gott dayum tired of my friends thinking I am a mothafukkin halfway house just because I am a single guy and have a two bedroom apartment.

Since I have lived in New York (two years), I have had FOUR people live with me for an average of 3 months each. You do the math. That is a YEAR of people living in my house and not paying rent.

Each time (except for one) , things ended badly. And the last one, whom I now call the Rock Kicker, stormed out without so much as a goodbye or thanks...  and we haven't spoken since. I even blogged about it... (Triflin' Azz Ungrateful People)

As I blogged before... I am worn out. But this friend has really been there for me through out my struggles here in NY. So I feel really bad about just saying no. But, while her moving here would help her maintain her sanity, it would totally disrupt mine. I LIKE having my own space. I LIKE having solitude and peace & quiet. I LIKE watching what I want to watch when I want to watch it on MY tv. I like blasting my music when I feel like it. I am a grown azz man who likes living on his own. Its not anything about her or my friendship with her... I just don't want ANYONE living in my crib that I am not related to or fukking, and really... not even then if marriage is not involved.

So... despite our friendship, and my love for her as my friend... I have to find a way to say no. I really hope that we can still maintain our friendship. And if not... well... at least this is way more efficient. It won't take three months of someone getting on my dayum nerves, eating my food, running up my utilities without chipping in...

Ultimately, she is not homeless, and her discomfort is not worth all the drama I would have to endure of someone disrupting my personal space... AGAIN. I just can't do it. I am finally learning to say... no.

Entertainment drama...

Hey everyone...

I know its been eons since I have sat down to blog... but I just haven't felt motivated to write.

But another reason I havent been blogging much is because I have landed a lead role in an off-off broadway gospel theater production that is going up in September and October.

I have been in rehearsals for a couple months now, but I never mentioned it before this because, until now, I wasn't really feeling this production. It was kinda whack... The writer/producer is a new young writer, and kinda amateur-ish in how business is handled. The director was a nice guy, but kinda crazy... like need therapy or short hospital stay kinda crazy... and the stagemanager was sexually harrassing the women.

In addition to all that drama, the director was not good. He let us make up our own staging, and then edited what we did. In other words, he didnt direct us. It may seem cool at first since you have almost total freedom, but when you consider that there are 6 people on stage and everyone has their own idea of how the scene should go, and each wants to make their character stand out and shine... and it becomes total chaos.

I felt like I didn't know what the hell I was doing. The scenes looked random... it was so whack that I didn't even want my fam to come see it. Basically, I was only doing it to get some practice at my acting skills. And if something better came up, I would have taken it. Since I am just starting to professionally act, I need to get my practice where I can.

The initial drama came to a head when the director told us that he had considered suicide the week before... And that was the last straw, and the producer/writer of the show fired him... (a week after he fired the stage manager for following one of the actresses home...)

And that is when I learned what a difference a good director makes... Our new director was PHENOMENAL! The show looked great, I loved way the show was going and now I am ready to invite the world, and even agents to come and checking out my acting chops.

But... the drama doesn't stop. The writer/producer starts ego tripping and wanting to tell the new director how to do her job, she cussed him out, and he fired her. The young director/writer who is producing his third production, was telling a 30 year theater veteran that her scenes weren't theatrical enough... that she wasn't handling the actors right... blah blah blah... and now... we are back at square one.

I am so worn out, and drained from this whole thing... but I have invested so much time and energy into this that I dont want to pull out now. But I DONT want to go on stage and look whack in front of my fam and friends.

We have a new-new director... a month out from the opening... and I am really trying to hang on cause despite his inexperiene, the young writer/director means well.  And the cast is all made up of all people trying to break into show bizness... so leaving at this point would fukk everyone over.

I just have a month left. And if this new director is good and the show continues where the last one left off... I will tell you guys so you can come see it. If not... you won't hear a dayum thing about it... lol

Entertainment is DRAMA... both on and off the stage and screen... I guess I am paying my dues.

Anyway... since it has been forever since I have blogged, I will mention other randomness...

I LOVE... LOVE LOVE LUH-HUH-HOVE... the Tide Talking Stain commercial... It's one of the funniest commercials ever. When the stain starts screaming in the end, I laugh hysterically every time I see it... If you havent seen it... check it below. TOO FUNNY!

Also, I am loving Solange. I was hearing leaked tracks over the last year and was telling folks that they are sleeping on Solange, but no one wanted pay me any mind... But now she is coming up, and peeps are jumping on the bandwagon... She will make it out of Beyonce's shadow yet... just watch.

In other randomnes... I truly feel that this whole retro 80's crap is out of hand... I HAVE SEEN FIVE PEOPLE UNDER THE AGE OF 30 WITH JHERI CURLS!!!

Who knew that they still make Jheri Curl Products?!?  In 1984, 5 people with Jheri Curls may not seem like a lot, given the millions of people living in New York. But in 2008... that is a ridiculously large number! Where the hell are they buying the relaxer? Where do they buy the activator? What hairdresser even offers such services? Are they doing it themselves? So many questions... I am so confused. I just truly hope that does NOT catch on. In 1984... Jheri Curl was the bomb. In 2008... not so much. Boo.

SEKSHUL CHOKLATE!!! He sing so lovely don't you think?

Who would want to go back to this? ugh.

Triflin' azz ungrateful people

Ok... I have to vent... so this is going to be a long post... let me apologize now. Ok.. with that said... here we go.

My house has come to be known as the halfway-house because I had someone living with me 8 out of my first 10 months in NY, between my old roommate in CT (3 months), and my homeboy from Chicago who moved here to try to go to grad school(5 months), neither of which paid any rent. I am not bitter about them. My old roommate has helped me in a zillion ways, and my homeboy from Chicago later did kick in some dough to help pay some of the bills he created after I cussed him out a little. I am cool as hell with them and there is no bad energy associated with them at all.

Now, after the initial drama with Chicago homeboy, I was determined to never have any long term boarders in my crib anymore... I just couldn't take the unnecessary drama. It wore me out.

So my homegirl from undergrad, with whom I have been friends for over a decade, was trying to move back up to NY from Miami. She told me her hard luck story about staying with her sister whom she doesn't get along with, sleeping on the floor, and dealing with a 2 hour commute each way to work...

Yep... you guessed it... MY STUPID BLEEDING HEART AZZ CAVES IN! And I let her stay with me thinking that it would only be for a month or so...

Two months later... (yes two months later with no rent, and not any closer to saving her money) I am planning a big bday party for my best friend at my apartment. I tell her a week in advance that we will need to put all her stuff under my bed and in closets because I will need to use my guest room, which is set up like a sitting room with a futon couch and plenty of open space, as an overflow space for the party. I know my parties, and I know that I would not be able to contain all of my party guests in my living room and dining room. While this apartment is big for one person in NY, its still only a two bedroom.

She gets an attitude and is like... 'I dont know man.' Huh? What is there not to know? It's my apartment, and I am going to need the space, so for that evening, we need to put your stuff up. So people can come chill in here. But I didnt say it like that... I told her she was welcome to stay for the party, or go somewhere, but I need the space. And she is like, what about when I want to go to bed? I am just going to kick folks out of here and go to bed. Ummm... no. No you aren't. I say when my party is over. Again... its my apartment. We don't beef, I just didnt feel like going back and forth or debating. I just repeated that the party was a week away and we need to put her stuff up, and call it a day.

During the next week, she gets sick. Like REALLY REALLY sick. She is calling in to work and everything. I am going to the store and getting her chicken soup and Theraflu, and waking her up to take that stuff every four hours. I am really looking out for her, cause she is my girl, right?

So Saturday morning, the day of the party, and she is feeling a little better but still sick. I am cleaning all of the apartment preparing for the party. She is in my guestroom knocked out, and go in to wake her up. I told her that today was the day of the party and that we need to pack up her stuff to put away, and that I arranged for her to chill at my homeboy's crib while the party was going on, BECAUSE I KNEW that she didn't bother to check to find some place to go.

All hell breaks loose. She is acting like I am throwing her out on the streets and she is sick and that I am so foul. And I am like... first of all, I am just putting her stuff out of sight so it doesnt get damaged, and I have a place for her to go which is literally two buildings over from mine. AND I told her about this shyt LAST WEEK! Why the fukk did you ignore what I told you a week ago? I TOLD YOU WHAT I WAS GOING TO DO! WHY DID YOU IGNORE IT LIKE YOU WERE GONNA DO WHAT YOU WANTED ANYWAY?

Yes, I realize and understand that you are sick, and that you don't know my homeboy and dont want to chill at his house but I am having a party for my best friend, and YOU are not him. He takes priority homey. And I am NOT cancelling his party because YOU are sick. And I am NOT cramping 200 people into those two rooms. (literally at one point there were over 200 people in my apartment...)

Finally I got tired of arguing and said, THIS IS WHY I DONT HAVE A ROOMMATE! I dont have to debate this shyt. This is my apartment, and THIS is what is going to happen in MY apartment where I PAY RENT. So she opted to call her cousin to come get her, and she packed up all her stuff and moved out that night.

Do you know that when she left, she didn't say goodbye, OR even thank you? She stayed her azz in my house TWO MONTHS and didn't speak when she left. I had to hit her up for my keys via blackberry messenger, and she sent them via mail in a thank you card that just said, 'thanks for everything' with the keys in it. And she subsequently removed me from her blackberry contacts.

Am I crazy? Cause I feel like this not only some ungrateful azz bullshyt, but kind of on the 'Fukk you nigga' tip. The crazy thing to me is that she doesn't have very many people in her life that she can count on like me. For example, at her birthday event, there were a ton of people there... the bill comes up short, and SHE and I... the two BROKEST NIGGAS THERE, have to come up with the missing dough and tip. Mind you, these other people are PAID!!! (there were a couple 7 figure niggas in attendance) and the birthday girl, and a struggling actor/web designer are putting in the extra dough. (I didn't even DRINK because I KNEW I didn't have the dough, but I couldn't let me girl go out like that cause she was my friend, right?) She can't even stay at these other mothafuggas houses overnight much less two months, but I bet they are still in her blackberry... lol If they let her crash and told her that they needed her to clear out for a night, she would have done it without thinking twice. But because I am not a celeb or have mad dough, my friendship is not that deep.

I am venting now, so clearly, it got to me... I thought we were tight. And I didn't think that this would end our friendship. But on the flip side, its all good. If she is capable of this, she is not the type of friend I need. I do have plenty of wonderful friends. I am blessed. Its unfortunate that she is no longer one of them. And even more unfortunate that she lost a friend like me, because as I experience shyt like this... I realize more and more that sincere people like me are rare.

Now that I have vented about this situation, I am officially over it. I hold no ill will towards this girl. I wish her well. But she can go kick rocks.

Oh... and from now on... anyone staying with me more than a week... IS PAYING RENT!!! (Fukk what you heard!) lol

Greetings from Plus One Land

I must say that I have been very fortunate to know a few industry folks (just a few) that can get me into cool events.

On Saturday, my homeboy brought me along to a cool Thurgood Marshall Scholarship fundraising event and was seated right behind Farnsworth Bentley and his wife (*sidenote* yes, his wife?!? lol He is married to actress Faune Chambers, the suspicious girlfriend in the Wayans brothers movie, White Chicks. I know, I thought he was gay too. Not that you can't be gay and have a wife too, and but since I have never seen him fellating anyone, I will give him the benefit of the doubt. But I will say that prancing around in a video with a great big pink and green sorority umbrella and allowing yourself to be referred to as another grown azz man's 'man-servant' IS as close to sucking a dick as you can get without actually doing it... lol *but I digress*)

While I was there I also met barrier breaking black model Beverly Johnson, who doesnt look a day over 28... I kid you not. That heffa is my momma's age and she looks like she is younger than me! I mean, yeah, black don't crack, but that shyt was ridiculous. (I think she is a vampire. No. Really.) I was a little awestruck at first but I kept my cool. She was very sweet and gracious taking pictures with fans. Unfortunately, I lost my camera a couple weeks ago, so I wasnt one of them.

Then last week I was in LA with one of my other homeboys where  I met Laurenz Tate (He is super tiny in person, and looks young enough to be carded... lol Does ANYONE in hollywood age? lol) And Hosea Chanchez (Malik from the show 'The Game' on CW) and a few other folks.

The week prior to that, I was hanging with another of my friends at a Tavis Smiley event and met Judith Jameson, Terry McMillan, Ruby Dee, Iyanla Vanzant and a few other folks...

And while this sounds all fabulous and grand... its sooooooo nothing to brag about. If you notice, preceding every grand story, I say, someone BROUGHT me along. I was only the PLUS ONE at all of these events. Plus One land doesn't totally suck... you get the open bars at most of these events. And once you are inside and have your own VIP bracelet, you are just as VIP as anyone else.  And while its great to get to go to some of these functions and meet peeps you admire... WOULDN'T IT BE BETTER to actually be invited? Can I please step up to a velvet rope and say MY OWN name and have THAT checked off for a change?

I am soooooo tired of being the 'and guest'. First of all, most of the time, peeps who get invited to these things first think to invite other 'regulars', or people they normally hang out with at these things. It's only if those peeps already have an invite themselves (usually the case) or if those peeps can't make it for some reason that they go to the b-list of folks who wouldn't have their own invites. Thats my category, so by the time I get the invites... its last minute. I literally got a call about a Playboy industries party FROM THE PARTY a couple weeks ago. My boy called me up like... 'yo, this shyt is hot! I am hanging out with Megan Goode. You should come', as if I was sitting at home dressed waiting for a call to just run out and party.

Shyt like that drives me crazy. But... you know my black azz showered shaved, picked out gear, ironed and got from the high 140's to lower manhattan in under 40 minutes... lol WHY? Because until I network enough to make a name for myself or land a good gig, I gotta do what I gotta do to make it out of PLUS ONE land.

So until I get my own star on the walk of fame... my black azz will have outfits on standby, and my electric shaver plugged in my bathroom. The life of the plus one is being in the army reserve, you never know when you will be called to action, but you must always be ready.